Have you ever had one of those 24 hr periods that was so fantastic and fullfilling that you just can't belive it? I had one that just ended at about 19:00 when I got back to my truck and headed to ND.

I am not sure why the Lord decided to bless me so much, Jesus, of all people, knows I don't deserve it. Maybe it was just a reminder of why He has me on this earth. Last week, or the week before, I don't remember to clearly, I had a conversation with Him and told Him that while I planned to live out my full 120 years, and would fight death with everything I had, I was ready to go home. Some parts of my life had me down, and if that was the way it was to be, then I would rather not stick around.

Anyway, I will keep this brief, I got into TX at about 20:00 two nights ago and headed to a poker party at the absolutly wonderful Abby's house, to late to play, but not to late to hang out and chat. I met the thoughtful Allie from www.xanga.com/beautifulsista, got to see ever enlighting Sherman Lee, the rockin cool man Ribb, the delightfully perfect couple MegLeb, the brother of another mother Cleaver, the so cool she gets mentioned twice Abby, sleepy Josh(very breif) and spend some real quality time with the dearly missed drinking companion Grass and his new Mac.

Did some shopping, the next morning so the beautiful mother Megan could make biscuts and gravy(my favoritest breakfast of all time) and then hang out with her super husband, Caleb, the new fantabulis renter couple Jeff & Lauren, the ever increasingly cute babies Zachy and Evelyn, the amazing Cleaver and the beautiful BeRekah. Cleaver got me "24" season 6 for Christmas and wraped it in 13 layers of wraping paper/boxes/tape. I took my usual time opening it. It took probably 20+ min to get to the DVD's. Awesome time spent in anticipation.

Then escorted the bright sparkly BeRekah to Wal-Mart in Lindale, chatted some, not enough but good enough for now. Stole a big hug and was ready to head to my truck at 14:00. Called work and they were not done working on it. Called the manliest of men Joe Day up told him to go to a movie with me, he said yes, called the always charmingly honest Candice convinced her a movie would be more fun then unpacking. Picked her up, met with Joe and saw "I am Ledgend"(great show if you never read the book), dropped her back off at TM and as the final added bonus, the amazingly wonderful Evan Jones sacrificed beauty sleep(she has no need of it anyways) to see me for a whole 10 min.

Then off to my truck feeling more loved and happy then I have right to be. Someone, Grass, had asked how the biscuts and gravy was, my reply to that really sums up my entire day. It was "Jesus looked down from Heaven and the light from His smile shone brightly upon me." Amen

I seem to be ok with sticking around now. But who knows the mind of God, maybe this was just the going away party . . .

BlackWolf

PS see how great my day was, that was just the brief version, imagine if I went into detail. Jesus definitly loves me, He told me so.

It's not like you'll need anymore evidence that I am not the normalest person in the world. In fact many of you know just how insane I am. And trust me when I say this, I appriciate the fact that you put up with it.

So what am I blabbering on for? Well I made a deal with God when I was younger, and that was that I liked snow and cold so much, that I would never veiw it negativly, and always rejoice about it.

One of the few commitments I have kept with Him. I sometimes think I am the worlds worst sinner. I am sure we all feel like that now and again. Anyway, to the point.

This artical made me weep for joy. SNOWBALLS CHANCE IN . . .

Fucking Cowards, stupid humans, and who is responsable for it all.

So I just wanted to establish a few things. This is mostly about a couple main things I can't stand in people, one is cowardice(thus my general disregard of the french) and the second is stupidity(thus my continually used phrase "stupid humans)".

If you are going to do a crime(or any non-conformity action for that matter) be prepared to do the time. Or to put it simply, "Take responsibility for your actions"

Now who am I talking about? Let's start with the cowards.

Well on the coward part, the perpetraitors of these school, mall, workplace shootings. If you want to kill people, by all means go ahead. Make a statement, attack a military base, a police station, a well armed cult compond, pick on someone who can pick back. But don't be a coward and pick on 1.) kids at school, 2.) teens, tweeners, and "I wish I was young so I hang out where the young ones hang", mall rats, 3.) the co-workers whom you know to be unarmed.

And for crying out loud, how did you ever come to expect that people will respect you when you don't even have the guts to stick it out for a shoot out with the cops. No one likes a quitter, finish the race strong, go down in a hail of bullets. Or better yet, stick around to tell your story in person, let everyone know that your mother didn't breast feed you, that your father wasn't around, that your uncle touched you, your teacher ignored you, your sister wore your underware, or that your peers called you a "dork faced dufas". You will have at least 10 years worth of court trails and appeals plenty of time for you to write a sad song, fill a book of memoirs, or if actually have any tallent, a movie script. Your story will be told by the one who can tell it best, you.

Now time for the stupid people.

This is directed at nearly everyone else. Where are these shootings taking place? . . . I'm waiting for an answer people . . nope try again . . . come on folks, it's simple . . . whats the same about each place?

Fine I will just tell you. Each place is a "GUN FREE ZONE". Tell me are you allowed to carry a gun at your workplace, local shopping hangout, or your school? No you are not.(the preceading statement should cover nearly everyone, if not you are special.) So what is a gun free zone to a coward? Your getting the hang of it, somewhere where (is that proper english?) a coward can go, shoot as many people as he/she can in under five minutes, then put a gun in there mouth and shoot themselfs. Yea, great freaking idea, the only person to not obey the law is the coward with the gun. Who will stop him or her? Is a grandma with her bullet proof shopping bag going to rush him and tackle him to the ground?

Lastly, responsibility.

What are you doing for protection? What is your first line? (not including God, He is just as likely to let you get shot as the next guy, no predicting His motives in all this) More then likely you are dependent on the police for your protection. Is that bad or wrong?

Yes.

Why do I say that? Cause the police(just like firemen and E.M.T.'s) respond to an incident. They don't prevent, they show up after and mop up the mess.(mostly) Prime examples other then all the shootings, car accidents, Katrina, the Cali fires, middle east turmoil. If you want to be safe, you have to do something about it, take up sprinting, archery, handgunning, buy a bullet proof shopping bag, take counseling classes, maybe some martial arts, what ever you do, get trained profesionally, and when the time comes, act, don't react.

As a side note cars kill more people then guns everyday, and how many "CAR FREE ZONES" do we see?

Now in conclusion(I love that phrase, and I know if you have already read this far you probably are board and just want to get it overwith) I simply want to ask a question then answer it.

Who is soley responsible for the safety of you?

You.

BlackWolf

PS, I would like to be able to appoligize for using a crass word to emphasize my utter disgust for these cowards . . .

"If its good, steel it!" Ron Luce, leadership confrence, Dallas 1996

If you got the time to read the below poem, take the time to do so. If not, click away at the next link and try to remember to come back when you do have that time to spare.

I don't really see me posting a poem as stealing, especially when if you click on the poem it takes you to where you can find it, and many other words of wisdom from a wise man. So with that in mind, I find this a comfort to me, a way of re-alining my thinking with that of the Most High.(Not high like on dope, like high in ascention of power. Tippity top of the food chain, the creator of the food chain, He could eat the entire universe in one giant spoonful) Anyway, wise words from a wise man . . .

Virtue Reality

In a world where quantitative values have obscured the reality of qualitative values - where we long to measure progress and chart growth, it is easy to give in to the temptation to judge ourselves and to try to walk by sight. But into that confused and meaningless effort God speaks with His great, still and small voice, with his Christ. He speaks through these invisible virtues with which His people shine and in the light of their lives this desperate, smug world sees not strength, wisdom, or even love, but Him who is the source of these things and the savior of humankind. Let us in whom He dwells look also to Him so we can shine more brightly.

So evan though I am currently(I am almost back to logic and questioning the benefits of second guessing my third or forth guesses) overreacting, better yet, reacting over emotionally to the possibilty of loosing a friend(they are a pretty great person or they wouldn't have been my friend in the first place so I am thinking that the chances are slimer then I had first thought in my panic)the Lord has blessed me with other sane people to calm me down.

He is pretty much the best Friend ever, sending those with love, wisdom, guidence, and caring my way to comfort me in my time of scared panic.

I am blessed, loved, and humbled by the Mightyness of God.

BlackWolf

P.S. THANKS FOR EVERYTHING!!!!

So all in all I had a great thanksgiving week.

I have been preoccupied by one relationship where I fear I am loosing a friendship, but I have taken the time to look past that and count all my blessings, and to be thankful for the great life I have. I have seen probably 25 different people in one week, all people I know and love, and I have enjoyed my time with them.

I got to go to church this morning, and worship was really good. I do miss being able to go on a regular basis, but it does make me appriciate the days I do get to have that much more.

I have a great life, the Lord has blessed me more then I could ever imagine, and yet I seem to expect(maybe I am selfish, I say to myself sarcasticly) and even demand more of Him. I do see the other side, I do see that I am blessed, and I acknowledge that it is all the workings of God. Anyway I am rambling.

I am in Houston, on the road again, life is great . . . mostly.

BlackWolf

So I got in all 4 Colorado stops minus one person.

Keenesburg, Aunt who just had the double massectamy, and her clan, fun times.
Denver, wanted to see my brother Mickey, no luck there, but I did get to see Kelly Cleaver, she is one hard working and great gal.
Julesburg, Mom and Dad, there days of simple relaxing, wonderful.
Sterling, on one of the above days we hung out with my sister Mary, food, shopping, a blast.

I did get in my Nebraska stop, wasn't sure if it would work out, it did and my sister Sam and nephew CJ are doing really good.

Drove in and out of snow all the way to the TX/OK border, looks like I am only going to get in one Texas stop, but I had peeps from Garden Valley, Lindale and Tyler show up for food, movies and fun. Now if only the one from Van surprises me I will be extra blessed.

Here is one question, have you ever had a friend continue to hurt you over and over, and still question if they are doing it on purpose or not. I almost always assume people have good intentions, and expect the best out of them. Sometimes that means a friendship dies the death of a thousand needles. No fun when you are on the pointy side.

BlackWolf

Good news first, well crap that line makes me prioritise, give me a minute to get it all sorted out . . .

1. My Aunt's surgery went great, nothing was found in the lymphnodes so it looks great, all gotten in one fail swoop.

2. (This was the lead story, but it was shifted down cause its not as good as the above)It's snowing outside!!! And I am in Colorado, life can't get much better then that.

3. 3 Colorado stops down, 1 more CO, 1 Neb. and 3 TX left to go.

4. We cut up a deer for cooking tonight, partially anyway.

5. I think a girl I once thought about pursuing(till I found out what she really thought of me, mind you it is well deserved) is being pursued by someone else. If so(they are being sneaky) then it is a good thing for both. I do have mixed feelings and thoughts, not about them, but about me.

6. If the above is not true, the "he pursuing her" part, then I may be being posessive of what was never mine, and maybe even have some hidden "covetting of my neighbors ass" jealousy going on. Which makes me a creep. Nifty!

7. I am freezing, just crawled under my blankets and am ready to drift off to sleep.

BlackWolf

So enough complaining about complaining, there are more important things in life.

For Thanksgiving I will be or already have been to 4 locations in Colorado, 3 locations in Texas, and maybe 1 location in Nebraska, maybe more! I feel that its going to be a good holiday.

My Aunt is currently having a double Massectamy(if she were a chicken it be called "de-breasting", but she's not, she is tough and not scared)and if you got a second lift her up. Appearently its one of those surgeries where you know more afterwords then you do before, so we will see.

Have a blessed Holiday, and remember to count your blessings.

BlackWolf

Yea so I complain a lot on here. Don't want you all to think that I have a horriable life. I have an entire closet full of blessings, and I get 2 or 3 added to the pile each day, so I really have no reason then my own mental stability to acknoledge that there really are bad parts of life, so I am more able to appriciate the good parts.

I would list the blessings but you would stop reading part way down, don't worry I understand.

If I can find some time I will put up some pics, I know you all like those. Me too.

BlackWolf