So here I am, or at this point was in Canada.  A country full of people who want to be so much like Europe it ain't funny.  But that is why we were there to save the french people who couldn't run away from the English fast enough and had the missfortune of a Civil War in the states so we didn't put forth the effort to just take them over as well.

Its not really there fault, and that is why I have compation.  To an extent.

I really wanted to give these blokes credit for there strength and endurance living up in the North where they actually know what snow and cold is.  Then they disapointed me in the one way that they could have acquired my affection.  Me and some of my buddies (Certa, Bryan, Weed, Haver, and the Nunz.)got some free tickets to a hockey game.  So while we are sitting there watching I look around the stands and out of the nearls 3400 attendiees I am the only one, and I mean the only one sitting there in a short sleeve T-Shirt.

The game was rather good.  I look forward to the day when my wife can cuddle up next to me for warmth and watch the game.  Speakin on untouchable females I did notice something at the game.  Cheerleaders, well not really cheerleaders they were IceGirls to be exact.  Here is a discription that I texted to a friend of mine.

BlackWolf___So these Cheerleaders can't dance.

PhattyFriend_Cheerleaders never could dance. They just can't.

BlackWolf___Oh, ok, so I am right in my assumption that these Cheerleaders can't dance?

PhattyFriend_Correct Cheerleaders can't dance.

BlackWolf___Oh but the mascot, Bruiser is his name, a bull dog, he is teain it up, puttin these girls to shame.

That was a quick phone call next is the oneway text.

BlackWolf to PhattyFriend

"Sorry I incorrectly referred to cheerleaders dancing badly earlier. I apologize, they were not cheerleaders they were IceGirls, dancing badly. I will describe X the difference were kinda hard to tell. These girls were all still right around 5'5" tall, 120lbs.  All but one was blonde, and all but two had long straight X hair. All of them had pretty faces, and nicly shaped bodies.  Here is the differance, these girls wore long sleeved shirts that while being thick enough to keep X warm, still showed off the chest with the way they were sown together. They wore full pants that were sown in a fasion to outline each cheek individually. And X the girls moved throughout the arena sellin stuff, cheeing, tossin give aways, and playin with bruiser the mascot. They still had time to do bad dance routines. X Not that you cared. I hope your class went well this morning and that your visit with "Friend of PhattyFriend" was a blessing. I know you deserved it. GoodNight."

So that was the gist of the Hockey Game.  So you are not to terrably offended by my discription of the clothing, I do have a fondness of sewing.  And like to notice the cut and style of clothing.  Not that I will ever use it for anything, but it is still something to look at and notice.

But the funnest part of the weekend was trying to order "donut holes" at Tim Hortons.  I go up and oder a coffee.

"May I have a coffee?"

"What would you like in it."

"Coffee."

"Oh is that all, ok. Anything else."

"Half a dozen donut holes."

A look of bewilderment crosses this poor girls face, and I can't help but push on.

"Um . . . you mean donuts?"

"No I mean the holes from the donuts."

"Umm . . .Sir . . . we just refer to them as donuts."

"No, I really mean I want the holes, and you do not refer to them as donuts. Cause those are donuts (me pointing at the round things with holes in the center) and I want the holes that come out of them.(Pointing to the donut holes)

"Oh, sorry Sir, those are called TimBits."

"Oh ok, that makes some sense why you didn't understand what I was talkin about. Launguage gap."

"How many?"

"Half a dozen."

Again I get the look of bewilderment.

"Is that ten?"

"No, that is six."

"We don't sell them in six, only in ten or twenty or thirty."

"Oh you only sell them in the metric system huh?"

"What, oh umm no just tens."

"Ok, I will take ten. Umm Ma'me I have one more question?"

"Yes"

"Do I get a bakers dozen, or umm, a metric dozen or something."

Look of bewilderment, again.

"In the states when you order a dozen pastries, they throw one in for free, is that the case with the ten? Do I get an eleventh one for free?"

"Umm . . .No sir."

"Oh ok, one last thing, did you know that those timbits are actually the dough cut from the center of the donut?"

Bewilderment, she is good at this face.

"No, they don't they wouldn't fit."

"Ma'me, before you cook them they cut the center out of the donut, and that is what the donut holes are, just the center."

"Oh no sir that is not how they do it."

"Oh, ok, well you should check in back just to make sure, have a good night."

The look of bewilderment.

 

 

So I don't really know what to post.  We are in Canada.  Trying to save the Europe wanabees. There are great people here.  Tim Hortons never was and I still don't think all that great.  Although it is the best they have to offer so I will partake.  Gave my girl a black eye, it was an accident, she will be fine.

I am missing some people a lot.  Others not enough.  God most of all.

Mom is doing great she had a steroid shot in her knee and is feeling better.

I need some Jesus.  Not a bad mood, but a mood.

Life, liberty, and the pursuit of Jesus.

BlackWolf

So a quick post to ask for Prayer for my Mama, she is in the Hosp. right now, possibly anouther blood clot in her leg.  This almost killed her a few years ago.  No real details, not yet anyway.  I will let you know as I know more.  I hope its just nothing.  Just sittin here in St. Charles, a thousand miles away unable to do anything . . .but pray.

BlackWolf

PS Don't forget to read the below post.

Update 20:00 MST------She is going home for the night, and they don't think that it is a blood clot, but they are not sure what it is. 

Update 23:00 MST------She is home, its not a blood clot but something in her hip, not sure what they ran a bunch of tests and will know something on monday.  It don't appear to be anything life threatening.  That is the best news.  I will call her tomorow and find out more.  Thanks for the Prayers.

Update 17:15 MST------The next day. . . Oct 16th.  I talked to Mom, she is at home and in some pain. They think it is an injury in her knee or hip and it caused a lot of swelling in her leg.  They took a blood test which will probably tell them nothing.  She is going in next week for some x-rays and furher tests.  So far the only real dangers besides the pain is that this has messed up her dieabeaties.  So it is fluctuaing a lot.  So she has to be real careful and watch it real close.  Prayers are still appriciated.

So I have made it full circle.  I met all four of the Double BS'ers since they left me in august.  First Christine, then Bryan, then Diana, and lastly Mike.  That is so great, an acomplishment.  I don't always fulfil my goals all the way.  But this one I did, and I am happy about that.

Also on this weeks list of great people I saw is Mike, Little Miss Allie, Shawn, Brian Poston, Riley, and last but not least Kurt Trine.  That is so freakin awsome.

So the drive to St. Charles, MO was a great drive.  Stopped in Memphis to see the first three on that list above.  It was a great evening.  Besides that I realized that I have needed this alone time that I have in the Simi so much.  Life has been great and I have loved it.  I have needed this time to grow in Christ.

I have sent in my application and the money for it to the Dept. OF State.  My passport that is.  When i get it back I will be able to file for my visa to China.  I hope all will work for my trip to China.  I want it to happen in Dec., but God is in control and it will happen when it happens and I will be blessed whenever it happens.

I want to get there, I have wanted to since 1996, so it is nearly eight years and its about time.  I have waited in wanting and mind torcher so long.  Now I get to finaly go.  I know I am blessed and the Lord has his own timing.  I know that I have learned so much in the past years, and months to get me ready to go.  That is great.

This week in St. Charles is going pretty smooth, and I can't wait to get to Hamilton.  Maybe I will get lucky enough to escort a drunk Indian off of stage who happens to have had Jesus in his top hat.  That was so much fun, G and me taking this man back stage and beating the crap out of him.  Ok so we didn't beat him up but it would have been fun to.

Anyway this isn't one of my best posts, for somereason my brain is not in creative mode.  Which is unusual.

So bye for now,

BlackWolf

My heart was broke tonight.  I called Di and was going to chat with her about the debates, see if I could make her cuss about John Kerry again.  And when she answers the phone I hear people in the background.  Not her family but my MT04 family.  I could hear the infamous Mike Barker, and others.  I quickly let her go back to hanging with the old crew.  And asked her to pass me around.

I knew they were all togeather and enjoying seeing and greeting and huggin and cryin, and laughing and smiling, so I made a point to only spend a few seconds, a minute at most with each and move to the next.

Di then Mike then Bry then Shawn then Allie then Jessica then Bry again and then it was over.  Genevieve and Christine were pulling up outside and I let Bry go.

With that I felt my heart break.  Lookin for some glue I called Christine, she didn't answer(I didn't expect her to, she probably couldn't hear her phone over the girls screams.  I left a voice mail . . . Then called Genevieve . . . no answer again.  I left her a voice mail.

Then I came to world of Xanga. . . .the glue that fits. . .almost.

HaHa well its really not all that bad, but it is what it is.

I have a little green moster sitting on my sholder(that would be jeolously) but I have gotten over it before and I will do so again.

I pray that this time is great for them all and that peace, love and joy would be in abundance.  That they can feel the fulfilling of the mandate to "pursue life, liberty and happness"

Amen.

BlackWolf

Whew yesterday . . . what can I say?

For awile I regreated the whole of my past up till like 18 years ago.  The whole past 18 years I wanted to erase and do again.

There is still one part I wish I could, but the rest I know and see and will use it as a tool to reach the lost.

I really think that till I was like 10 years old or so I did a preaty good job.  I was young and innocent, mostly.  At that point it started going down hill and I don't think it ever reached that level of goodness again.

Maybe someday I could say, "I have reached that level that I was when I was ten."  I know I will be dead long before I reach the level of the Saints, but I will keep trying.  And that is all that Christ asks for.

And yes that "soul hug" at the end of God ripping me to shredds, his comfort, his peace . . . I needed that.

Live life folks, it dosen't get any better then this.

BlackWolf

I think I would like to start this post with . . .

TODAY SUCKED BIG TIME, but it also got good

today I failed before the lord, I ALSO SUCEEDED

TODAY I FELL, but I got up

today I almost told someone i love greatly, who is very near and dear to me I regreated ever knowing them, I DID TELL SOMEONE EVEN CLOSER THEN THAT I REGREATED EVER KNOWING HIM

TODAY I FACED A HORRIBLE MONSTER THAT THREATENS MY LIFE, and I fell into his trap

today I died, AND YET STILL SOMEHOW LIVE

TODAY I FOUND MY SOUL LOST AND WONDERING, but its closer then it has been before

today i cleaned house, AND FOUND GRACE AND MERCY FROM THE LORD

TODAY I GAVE IN, and recived it all

today i was broken, AND AM NOW WHOLE

TODAY I WANTED TO DIE, but yet now I want to live

today i failed myself, AND FOUND GOD PUSHING ME ONWARD

TODAY SUCKED BIG TIME, but it seems be getting better

In case you couldn't tell today was kinda ruff, I was faced with one of the biggest demons in my life, I fell to his temptations and gave up hope.  In my despair I cried out to the Lord, "Why me, Why must I carry this burrden, Why did this have to be my life, Why isn't there someone better, Why me?"  And he said "Its not about you, its about me.  I will carry the burden give it over.  You gave me your life, you can't have it back.  There is no one better then you for this.  Because before you came out of the womb, I choose you."

I was bitter.  I was angry.  I cursed and screamed. I gave up hope.  I quit the fight.  I decided I was better off before.  I found the bottom of the pit.  I cried.

He was patient.  He was listening.  He listened to my drible.  He gave me hope.  He sent me back to the front lines.  He showed me who I could have been if I had not chose him.  He lifted me out of the pit.  He comforted me.

Gosh can life swing from bad to good so readily.  I am glad I couldn't sleep past five am.  I am glad i got out of bed and sought the Lord.  I am glad he ripped my heart to shredds, only to sew it back up again.

I am loved.

BlackWolf

PS the answer to the contest is Diana Smith, her mama, and it happened at her house.

I hope she don't mind the story getting around or the pic that follows these words.

 

 

 

Ok so I wanted to put something funny up here but I couldn't think of anything.

But then I did and I have been arguing with myself ever since if I want to put it here.  Then I thought well if I make it into a contest then it may seem worth while.

So here is the contest, if you can guess where this story takes place and with whom it all involved I will send you a dollar.  Yes I could pay out in the hundreds or I could do to you like I did to gWyn on my last contest and promise to send you money while you are flat broke in New Zealand and never follow through.  I still owe her 10 bucks.  All entries must be submitted via the e-mail link, if it is submitted on the comments section then everyone and there grandma can answer the contest and instead of hundreds it could be thousands.  But I also know that you guys love me and want to leave comments as well as the e-mail.  So do both.

********************************************************

So within the past few weeks I was at somebodies house.  And while I was there I asked if I could use the bathroom.  I was pointed to a hallway and was told "Its the second door on the right."

I put my hand over my heart and say the pledge of allegince(this is how I remember which hand is right and which one is left) while doing so I look to the left and miss the first door on my right.  I am thinkin to myself that the second door on the right looks like a real big bathroom with a bed in it, and confusion is happening in my brain, when I am pointed to the real second door on my right.  I try to unembarass myself by saying that I had a good reason for not counting the first door on my right.  But when asked for explanation I couldn't come up with any so I humbly hung my head and walked into the bathroom.

I close and lock the door, as all gentlemen should do, especially when if the door were to open for whatever reason the first thing you would see is a guy standing there doing what a guy standing there in the bathroom would be doing.  And he would be facing you, slightly to your . . . left. . . yea left.  Then I lift the lid and do that thing there that a guy does while standing.  Well I look over to my . . . left . . . yea it was my left and I see this pretty typical lookin easter basket.  It is on the floor in the corner behind the door.  Or it would have been behind the door if the door were left open, but as I have already stated the door was closed.

Well in this easter basket is an arrangement of about 10 or so rolls of toilet paper.  It isn't stacked neatly on end or lined up in little rows its just kinda hap-hazardly tossed into the basket.  The first thought I think to myself  is that I had better watch my aim or I will have to clean up.  After making sure my aim is good my mind naturally wanders into that field where mens minds wander in the bathroom.  Its an open field of thought(The bathroom is probably the one place in the universe that the left and right lobes of a mans brain seem to work together in perfect unison causing the best of idea's and creations to come about, I back this statement up by the fact that all men who are certified as geniuses have went to the bathroom).  And across my mind comes the thought;

"Hummm, some people would be disturbed by those rolls of toilet paper just layin there on the floor in that basket for all the world to see.  (and the thought under that thought was was the justification for those people is that they are not extremely confident in how the Lord created them and think that the use for which toilet paper was made is something that should be a deep dark secret that no one should ever know that another human ever does.  Even though it is a perfectly normal thing that every human has to do, or they would swell up and explode at the age of like six days.)  But to me the sight of seeing the toilet paper in  the corner is kinda reassuring.  I mean if I were to sit down without checkin to see how much toilet paper was left on the roll, and suddenly after it was to late find that there wasn't any I could go into a panic, especially seein as I am in some one else's house.  (Side note: think this thought, of all the people in the house four girls of various ages, one man and one baby boy.  You only really know one, and they happen to be of the opposite gender, can you imagine the horror of yellin out "Hey there, do you have any more toilet paper. . .Oh you do . . . where . . . no its not under the sink . . .oh your out. . . hey do you think you run out and get some . . .no . . . why . . . oh its raining and you don't like the feel of rain drops on your skin. . . (remember this would all be yelled through a bathroom door) do you think you could pass a paper towel under the door or something. . . ok I'll wait. . . oh could you get like a yard stick or something and push it a little closer . . . more to the left . . . no the other left . . . yea thanks . . . oh this piece is all dirty from the floor, could you wrap another piece inside another piece and try again. . . yea I'll wait. . . hey you still out there. . . oh your on the phone. . . umm this is real important to me . . . oh there it is . . . to the right this time . . . yea thats it. . .hey thanks. . . see you in a minute" wouldn't that be horriable)  Yea this is good, when I get a house I am going to leave the toilet paper out in the open for all to see."

Yea thats just the begining of the story.  A few days later I call this person up and am talkin to them and decide that I should tell the story just for amusments sake.  This person starts laughing, rather hard then says "You have to tell Mama!" and before I have a chance to say "Heck no,  there is no way I am telling your Mama that I like her arragement of toilet paper in the corner" I am passed off. 

"Hello." Says Mama.

A very nervous casey sasys "Umm yea, hello Mrs. _____, uh yea well when I was in the bathroom the other day. . . I noticed you arrangement of toilet paper in the basket in the corner, and I thought to myself that some people would probably find it a little disturbing  . . .but I kinda found it umm . . .reassuring, I mean if someone were to . . . umm be (the thought crossed my mind, make sure you say this next word right or you are in big trouble) sitting down and suddenly found that the roll was empty they would have no reason to panic because there is a big pile just right there."

"Laffter." From Mrs. _____

Then in a daring effort to unembarass myself again I continue on.  "Oh did ______ relay the message to you about you and food and me?"

"No."

"Oh well she should have, I ment to tell you while we were all watching the David Letterman show that night.  Everytime that you and food and have crossed paths with me, I have never been disappointed.  You have alwasy done me well."

"Lafter" Then I am passed back to friend who humbled me in the first place.

**************************************************************

So there it is.  I don't know why I am thrown into these humbling places like this, but I all to often am.  I guess its casue God knows that if he didn't do this to me on a two or three time basis every week, sometimes daily, that I would be a pridful erogant jerk.

So take time, think hard and submit your entries.  All must be e-mailed the link is about an inch below this line.

BlackWolf

Boy ever since I tried that last post and Xanga and/or the TM system wouldn't let me post all the pics I wanted to I haven't felt like posting.

Maybe I am depressed that they ruined a great work of art, or may be I am just bitter in general with the world as it treats me like crap.

Or maybe I just don't have any clue what to write and have writers block.  Or maybe I was at the first ATF event of the season up in Amherst Mass.

Its probably the last one.  A lot of people worked there butts off to make this event great.  And it was.  People got saved and the world is a little bit better becasue of it.  Props go to the new team.  Not just the new Ministry Team, but the new Creative Team that helped make this years event as new and hip as possible.  Praise to the Lord for his work.

As usual the best way for little ole me to fit in was to drive.  Unfortunatly it also included shopping.  I hate shopping but i get stuck with it way to often.  Just becasue I am good at navigating a city I have never been in and am good at interperting someones personality with the object they actually desire, and while I hate it, I am good at shopping.

It could be worse.  It most definutly could be worse.

On the way to Amherst I got to see some great people just a quick list and then I am off to find supper.

Oh these guys wern't there, but I did just watch this debate in the Auditorium, way to go Mr. President.

 

I got to see Genevieve and Christine plus some randome guy named Phillip while I was going north on I-81, they were going south, we crossed the Potomic River at the same time, and seeing as they were in a car and I in an 18 wheeler, they turned around and came back to me.  My truck still smells like them, it is so nice and comforting.

For like literally five minutes I got to see the famed Bryan James Boecker.

It would have been longer but I was kiddnapped but Matthew Miller, an old roomate of mine from the 98/99 era.  We picked up one of my other roommates Alden Fahy at the Providence RI Airport.

Then after I got back I got to see David Warren and Chiquita Dearing.

My whole day is going great when Jack ? and Jake Swamer? show up.

Then I get to hang with Bry and Tristan for awile.

Then on the way home I get to see Diana Smith.

And when I get back on campus two of the first people I get to see are Paul J, and Autumn Ashley.

Can life get any better then old friends and new espresso maker, and grinder and cinniman/hazelnut coffee, hugs, laughs, storys, movies with old friends, watching your waitstaff dance to 50's music with a camara runner overer, a torrential rain storm with four inches of water running across the Interstate, a four hour traffic jam in Atlanta, and last but not least being humbled in front of all the TM staff at this morning Staff Meeting?

(In honor of Paul Y. who honors Brian Reagin) I submit that it can not!

BlackWolf

I pray that I may be blessed to see you next.  And that you can wade through my spelling errors to see the good stuff underneath.

Amen

Well Its Time To Start Again,

What you ask, start what again?

ATF--Acquire The Fire.

Off to Amherst, Much luv my Peeps.

A special thanks to the man who made this post possible. Bryan James Boecker

And now for the "Tear Jerkers"

No titles, no comments, just the love of the road.

Ok so there are about 5 more pics that Xanga ain't letting me put up.

Sorry this is it cause I am off to Amherst and am already late.

BlackWolf