Hey I am looking for a Daniel.  Read on it will make sence as you go on.

Last night I had a multitude of dreams all of which were preaty freaky.  But there was one that really stuck out.

It comes in two parts and is clear as day where the others kinda faded.  I was sleeping(as usual when dreaming) and then it happened.

I was standing at this little gully.  The gully is about fifteen feet accross and kinda weaving though a sage brush type of setting.  The gully is about 4 to 6 feet deep and is preatty much just a dry grey colored dirt with a little red mixed in.  The bank edges have cracked and kinda fallin in here and there.  My YP's van is parked a little away and I pulled up in my car.  My YP is wareing blue jeans, his cowboy boots and is standing there looking into the gully with his hands in his front pockets with just his thumbs sticking out.  He is waring a blue and red with small amounts of green flannel shirt, and not waring his usual baseball hat.  The wind is blowing slightly and his hair is being tossed about.  I can feel it on my face.

I kinda run/jog(jot?) up behinde him and in trying to scare him tap him on the back.  Without even flinching he falls into the gully.  Instinkly I know he hit his head or something and is dead.  Not wanting to be blamed for killing my YP I decide to leave and not call the police.  His van is parked in plane site and someone will wonder and come over and see him and call it in, and I am out of trouble.

During this time my feelings are very muted, I feel little remorse for killing my YP and am more concerned about not having to deal with the police.  Not because I could get into trouble, but because I don't want to waste time filling out paperwork.

Then I wake up.  I go to the bathroom take a leak and (why is it "take a" and not "leave a")  go back to bed.  After some more weird dreams I come back to the yp dream. 

This time I see his van is still parked there so I pull over and go and look in the gully to see if his body is still there.  Yup it is, and now a cyote is chewing on it.  And his hands are now tucked back into his pockets after they wern't when he fell.  His body is also moved about ten feet farther away almost but not quite around a corner in the gully.

So here is the question, why?

BlackWolf

You are 39% geekYou are a geek liaison, which means you go both ways. You can hang out with normal people or you can hang out with geeks which means you often have geeks as friends and/or have a job where you have to mediate between geeks and normal people. This is an important role and one of which you should be proud. In fact, you can make a good deal of money as a translator.">

Hey all I know you are waiting for the next instalment of my ranting and raving, but sorry I can't do it right now.  I am very upset over something, that something is my harddrive dieing on me.  It is slowly but shurly going out.  So I may not be on for awile, as I can't aford a new one for like a month or so, so for your info I am not dead yet, and don't think I will be any time in the near future.

Remember that just in case you are wondering where I am.

Later BlackWolf

So I was listening to the radio today and it got me a little rilled.  I was listening to a subjuect that I feel is very true and it iritates me to no end that others don't see it.  So in my limited realm of influence I have decided to spread my views to you, my readers.

The subject was of the womanizing of men.  Of making men into wimps.  If the word wimp offends you you can try saying it like this.  Making men into "socially acceptable" relics of their former selfs.  I totally think that men have succomed to the effect and influence of women.

Think about it for a minute.  (note to all I have made this argument myself but also herad it today on the "mike rosen" show on 850KOA a Denver station.  The speaker was pushing his new book named "No more Mr. Nice guy")  Anyway the direction that I am heading in is as follows.  Lets start with a mans first few years.  Who is the primary caregiver(sorry I hate to interject crap into the middle of sentenses but it is nessasary info, unlike what I just wrote.  I speak in a lot generalitys, meaning that what I say is not absote in every situation, but it is the common thread throughout most of them.) the primary caregiver is usually his mother.

Now this is a good thing, for the most part, but it does start the kid off on a slightly less manly path.  A natural instink of women is to nurture and protect, espesily with their offspring.  In most cases this is a good thing, but when it comes to men, it can be overbearing.  With the mom not letting the young boy explore and test his new environment.  (Please note that in the womb, boys are usually most active)  Anyway one of the instinks of men is to be overly curious.  And they do say that curosity killed the cat, so see the mothers job is a good one, but she should limit only the most deadly of trails, and leave a minimal amount of pain and suffering for the man-child to experience, it is a much needed learning path for a man to feel pain, and to learn how to deal with it.

Also let me point out one of my pet peeves, and it comes directly from the mother.  It is the mother teaching boys to pull their pants up to thier belly button.  That is just wrong and every woman who teachs her young man to do so should be shot.  Well maybe not shot but at least publicly beat.  Now you may be wondering what that is all about, and maybe you think it is not a big deal, well just hang onto your hats ladys and gentelmen.  Take note and picture a naked man and a naked woman in front of you.  You can blurr out the genitaila if you need to, but don't put on underware, it can interfear depending on which type you decide to dress up your naked people with.

OK got it . . .good so  from the front now, look at the guy, where do the top of his hip bones stop . . .see it . . . it is about mid-way between the blurry spot and his belly button.  OK now to the woman, where are the top of her hips . . .see it is almost right in line with the belly button, they may even merge with her love handles(good things in my point of view) causing then to appear to end a little above the belly button.  Note the guys almost always stop and then the love handles jut back out from there.

OK back view, (anouther one of those anoying breaks in a sentence, don't you hate them, anyway a famous quote made from the unique mind of me, when someone commented on my plummer pants, I told them "Crack only kills if you sniff it."  it is good one, add it to your quote board, or to your list or where ever.)  Notice that the the guys butt is flatter then the womans, and notice that the womans is bigger then the mans, also her hips are spread about 1/3rd wider then the mans.

OK side view, from here you can really notice more of the butt, again guys flat, girls perky.  But also note that the butt of the man while flatter also evens into the bottom of the lower back, a part of the love handles.  Now note the womans butt being perkier evens out into the mid or upper of the small of the back.

OK now that you have though about it, if you wanted something to stay up without suspenders or belt and were to hang it on the person, say a pair of pants, where would the obvious point be to hang it. . .Off of the hips, very good, ok the guys hips are bellow the belly button and the girls hips are even to above the belly button.  Natures perfect pant hangers.

Boy I have to tell you that that really bothers me when a guy pulls his pants up to his belly button, and when I see it I almost always ask him if it mother taught him how to dress, or if he is whareing girls pants.  Now if girls want to ware pants that show off the top of the hips, and or her belly button who am I to complain, after all I am a man, and that is what this whole thing is about.

Anyway the young mans formative years start with his mother, after about five years where does he go . . . into the school system, usually starting with a "Pre-Start, or Pre-School" program.  Then into kindergarden and up into fifth grade.  Please note that in Jr. High and High School their is an averge of 1 in 4 teachers being a man, but up though fifth grade only 1 in 10 of the teachers are men.

So your kid is 10 to 12 years old and has more then likely been taught by women his whole life.  Now why are the women teachers bad, well think back to the eighties, what was the big push . . .don't remember, let me remind you.  The big deal was that girls wern't performing as well as boys in school.  Now why was that, cause when a teacher asked a question the boy would jump up and answer, or would venture out and ask questions about things.  They were seen as being aggressive, while the girls sat there and tried to look as if they knew what was going on, shying away from looking as if they were stupid(note that this can be a life long problem if the girl dosen't learn better.  I recomend that you read my part on "old lady laws")  So what did the teachers think of to do, tame the men, those rascly impatent(jumping up or blurting out the answer) and rebellious (asking questions about everything) dang boys.  What about the girls, they did nothing, why because the girls are the lesser of the humans and instead of bring them up to speed they just rammed the ruler on the boys backside and told him to "behave".

Now I know you are probably thinking "what the heck is he talking about?"  I want you to really think about and look at life a little more closely from now on.  When you are in a trainning situation, who sets the pace, is it the fastest or best, no usually it is the set to the the slowest or worst of the class, think "Teamwork, stick together, don't leave a man behinde, etc."  Look closly, I tell you that on the general people set standards that even the dumb people can't mess up.

That gets me into "Old Lady Laws"  now what are old lady laws, well they are laws set into place for no other reason the for someone to have something to do.  I first thought of OLL while reading the "Tom Sawyer" books by Samual Clemmens.  I belive that ole Tom may have even used the line.

A few examples are "don't go swimming till an hour after you ate"  or "don't pet every dog you see" or "girls don't ride guys bikes" or "don't pick you nose" or "don't run with scissors" well you get the point, their are a thousand "house" rules that are designed for the "JUST IN CASE" sceanario that only happes once every ten thousand times, and that are even more  rarly fatal.  But they aren't the only OLL, a prime example are real laws that the Sente and House, and President make.  You know like the laws that are only made because some complete moron screwed up.

OLL just piss me off, and yes that may be a little offensive bit of a statement but put that into comparison with the "guys pants" thing where it is mearly a pet peeve.

Well it is late but I wanted to let you know that this isn't the end of my ranting and raving.  With in the next couple of days(don't hold me to that) I plan to write more on the "womenizing of men"  and want to include the whole "relationships" arena, and the negitive view of men by "fem-nazi's" (a word that is now in the dictionary and was first invented and used by rush limbaugh, cool huh?)  Also how the world has changed forever.  It all started about 3 decades or so.  That sagement will be titled . . .

"When men where men and women were in the kitchen"

So check back and be entertained or offended.  Also let me know what you think, and make sure you think about what I said.  You can't go around saying you are open minded with out actually thinking about things.

Here it is, the best day of the year, it is June 13th, and you may ask "Well why is that so special?"  Well it is because on this day 25 years ago I was born.

And for any of you who forgot I am going to reinform you that June is the best month to have a B-day.  Now if you still don't remeber then let me reinform you one more time, it is half-way from Christmas.  Every six months I get gifts.  It is great.

Although I haven't got anything this year, well my Mom said I could skip the rent so I get 100.00 from her.  I actually don't get it till my next check one week and one day from today.  So on my B-day nothing.

Thinking of the last post I should get married, wifes are required to get husbands gifts for thier B-day, right?  Arn't they even required to think deeply and get you something you don't even need or want?  At least they had to think about it.

That reminds me, I have only come up with one problem about B-days in June, June is also fathers day, so come around to the time that I actually get married(which by the way, where I live there are like no Christian girls so I don't even have a chance of getting married.)(Oh yea the common saying around here is "The good girls are all taken and the bad girls won't have me.") and then get around to having kids(not to scare away any potiential mate but I want somewhere between 10 and 15, you don't have to give birth to all of them just the majoryity, I am fine with adoption) I will have to put up with the "two in one" gifts of fathers day and b-day all in one.

Oh well you can't have everything, at least I don't have a B-day in Dec where they "two in one" and make it very cheap.

BlackWolf

Casey is getting married . . .well maybe . . .someday . . .

I know, I know, I know, nothing in two weeks and then three posts in the same day.  But this one is important.  You see, I was talking to someone about the last post, I actually asked her to Marry me, she said we should take some time. 

I just met her tonight her name is . . ., well I don't remember her first name but her last name is Woodmansee, I think that is cool, it reminds me of Yoda teaching his padawan about a forest, just say the following line in your best Yoda voice "Wood(pause for effect) man see, but clouded his mind it" anyway you get it.  I will work on her first name.

Anyway I asked her to Marry me and  she said . . . well I will just cut and paste the IM message I am "Im Black Wolf:" and she is "Woodmansee:" that isn't her real AIM screen name, I changed it for her protection, and to keep her away from other guys but that is my AIM name, anyway;

Im Black Wolf: oh, well then what date should we set for the wedding?

Woodmansee: lol

Im Black Wolf:

Woodmansee: wow, a proposal.  how sweet. :-*

Im Black Wolf: LOL

Woodmansee: and you don't even know what I look like.

Im Black Wolf: I wouldn't even ask you to change your last name

Woodmansee: oh, thanks.

Im Black Wolf: Well that is at the bottom of my "mate" conditions list

Woodmansee: that nice of you.
Woodmansee: ?  what are you talking about?

So I refrenced her here, and I thought I should make it clear that these really are are my "mate conditions" and if a girl don't score high on 2 and 3, then whatever her score on 1 ain't going to matter.  And if she scores high on 2 and 3, then the score on 1 ain't going to matter.  So this is it I am now refering to the last post as

Mate Conditions List

BlackWolf

*

Do you know what that little symbol means, it is called so many things, an astrick, a star, that little button on the bottom of your phone number pad . . .ok well maybe they don't call it "so many things" but there is more then one name, anyway . . .it usually means in writings that if you look at the bottom of the page you will see a note of the meaning or furthering explaination of what was said.  Well I used one and here is the reason why . . .

Still waiting, good so here it goes . . .

In the post made on May 19th I refred to a girl as a "hotty".  I just wanted to explain why I had done that and how I classify women.  Now this will either vindicate me of being a "selfish male pig" or confirm it.  I don't think I am, but you never know what women will think.

As a side note is "women" the right way to spell what I mean, I mean a girl, but if there are many girls is it the same.  I always get it messed up, does it change to be plural, and what is the actual spelling.  Is it woman, women, wemon, weman, these are just a few of the spelling I get messed up with.  Anyway back to my astrick.

I classify girls, (that is much eaiser to spell, and if you want to make it plural as I did you just add an s, so simple, if only life we so . . .) in three diffrent ways.

Now some of the classifications are more imidate and others develope over time.  That is just the nature of meating people.  Never go off of your first impressions.  That is my motto.

Now in no particular order here they are, I am going to start with the one that is the most common.

********************1********************

Visual inspection . . .now don't go gitty on me just sit back and read, it could be good for you.  I start out with a quick once over and pick out the most beutiful part of the woman, now not every girl is as easy as the other, some you have to look deep and others you can just pick where ever you are looking.

I firmly belive that every girl has some beutiful part of her body, be it the eyes, nose, ears, the face in geral, forearms, ankles, toes, fingers, belly button, the flap under her arms, her smile, teeth, calf, and of cource you have to include her butt and her chest.  I tend to leave those two for last, they are the most obvoius so it kinda missed the point in searching for the obvious, I look for the non obvious.

********************2*******************

Second is the attitude, it can also be refered to as her character.  Now personaly I think this is more important then looks.  I have met some women who are the easy ones to pick beuty, you know look at them and where ever your eyes fall you got something preatty.  But their attitude sucks so bad you don't want to even be around them.

I look at how easy it is for them to laugh, how long does it take them to get angry or frustrated, are they honest, do they rely on make-up and/or diets,(i'll explain why this is important and in character in a moment), are they up-beat, depressed, do they look at the bright side of all situations, do they try to hide their feeling, are the cautious with thier emotional signals, do they flirt, do they hesitate. 

All of the above and much more fall into this catagory of attitude.  Anyone can have a bad day, a week, a month or a year, and this is one of the most changing catagorys a person can have.  Most people are constantly updating their character their whole lives, I look at how they go about doing this, do they always jump around and change, or is a gradual change over many years.

Oh yea almost forgot, the comment on do they rely on diets andor make-up, this a one of the most serious area's of a persons life.  Now I mind someone who wants to go out jogging every morning to keep in shape, or goes on a diet three times a year to lose 10 pounds, (two weeks before thanksgiving, two weeks before christmas, and two weeks before summer).  I also don't mind them using make-up to highlight, or on special occations, but when they rely on it and cake it on so thick it shows that they are trying to hide something, something that they don't like about themselfs.  And that is the problem, now I admit I am a big guy, I was born 10+pounds and have been big from that day on, I know that and accept that.  For example I just switched jobs from one that reqired me to work real hard to one that I sit around all day, and even get to take a nap every now and then, so now I need to excersize and diet as I suddenly balloned by 20 extra pounds, that isn't a problem, that is a minor correction.  I don't rely on a diet to make me happy.  I know I am big and that is how I am.  But I am not lazy and fat.  I would challenge anyone to out work me in not a simple day challenge but a month, if you think you can do it and can afford it, I will accept any challange.

********************3********************

Third and the most important one if you are looking for a mate, but not the most important if you are looking for friends and acquintences.  Is are they a Christian, do they belive that Jesus Christ died on the cross for them, and for everyone in the world.  What are they doing to further that movment in thier world.  Not the whole world, but in thier little part of the world.

So when I comment on someone being a hotty, a cutie, a babe, a sister, a girl, a crazy, a woman, or a person from a diffrent planet, I have put a lot of thought into it and appriciate that person for who they are, and who they can become.  If I refer to them as a dog, a *itch, or someone with bad attitude I have thought about it and made my mind up, but it is alway open to a reapraisel, anyone can go up or down, and I will always do my part to help them up.

Of course I am not perfect and am sure I have helped a few down, for that I ask forgivness, and pray for their turn about.

BlackWolf

Hey I was just talking to a freind of mine last night and she talked about her breakup with a guy, it was the second relationship she has had in her young life, and it was preatty rough.  I was trying to encourage her and wrote this as an e-mail this morning.  I thought it would go good here.  Kinda serious, a change for me.  But remember, no ganging up on me, I don't want to have to retreat and build anouther wall around the fragile city of my mind.

BlackWolf

**************************************

Dear xxxxxx

Well sometimes it is good to hurt, I know that that sounds bad but it is good.

I am happy for you.  Not many people have even had one relationship that was worth a good heartbreak.  You were lucky, and if God sees fit for him to come back, he will.

I am glad that you had an opportunity to be vunerable, that is something that I find very hard for myself to do.  I have had a few friends die or leave suddenly early in my life and it is hard for me to open up intimatly to others.

A freindship like the one you and I have is as deep as it gets for me, while we are open and honest and can ask many questions and talk though many problems, and are close friends that as deep as it gets for me, I find it hard to open much more to people.  It takes me years to finaly break down the walls.  That is why TM was so good to me.

I learned that I could let down a section of my wall, and only be vulnerable in a little way, and spread that around to many people.  So if they all decided to get together and attack, I would be dead, but as it is, I am fairly safe.

I don't know if that makes much sense, but it does to me.

BlackWolf

I had the opportunity to be a "spare tire" and it was very enjoyable.

You know how you go out with a "couple" of friends.  Well I was in Denver and went out with two russian girls and my friends Mike and Patrick.  Oddly enough one of the russian girls name was also Casey(I don't know if she spelled it that way though).

So I was there with Mike and "a" russian girl and patrick and "b" russian girl.  I will now refer to the girls as as "a' and "b" respectivly.  Oh "b" is the russian whose name is also Casey and "a" is the other russian girl whose name starts with an A.

Anyway there were four of them and one of me.  For comarison you can figure in a front wheel drive car.  So that would make Mike and "a" the front tires driving and steering the date.  Mike and "a" set it up so they could go to the movies and Mike dragged along his best friend Patrick and "a" dragged along her sister "b".  That would make Patrick and "b" the rear tires, just hanging around because without them the car won't move.  Patrick wasn't really interested in "b" cause she wasn't his type.  Although she was a hotty.*  And then there was me the dusty, seldom used, locked up in the trunk, spare tire.  This may have something to do with the fact that I called them and told them I would be there two days before I got there.  Don't give them much time to find me a date.  And I ain't really looking for one right now, so I was cool with being the spare tire.

 So we go to watch the new movie "spiderman", which by the way is a very good movie.  They could have done some more work on the mixing of "animation" and real action, other then that a very eye pleasing movie.

I am the type of person who likes to talk during a movie, I like to point out things that don't "fit".  You know things like "guy loading into a gas chamber on a steel slab with no probes attached to him"  and the next sceen where he is wired to the bone with them.

Upside down wall outlets, very athentic looking steel wall paper, a very well built set of stairs in a shabby apartment, objects appering out of nowhere, spidy webs hooking onto air so spidyman can swing away, etc. etc. etc.

Well I know this bothers some people so before we go in Patrick tells me to keep my mouth shut.  He said it politly, but it still said it.  I always wanting to be on my best behavior wait for everyone else so sit down and I sit on the end(that way if I bother anyone it is only one person.  Well that person just happened to be "b".  While I, again being the gentleman, took coats and put them in the seat beside me so that while watchin the movie they don't fall off of someones lap and onto a puddle of pop on the floor.  While I do this I explain to "b" that I sometimes talk during a movie and while I am going to try not to talk I may, and if I start to annoy her in any way she has a varity of options,

a. hit me,

b. tell me to shut-up,

c. both a and b in no particular order.

She said she wouldn't mind too much, but I let her know the speil again, just in case she didn't undersand english too well.  She again said she wouldn't mind.

I trying to be a gentleman again thinking of Patrick and "b" tell her that I will try to keep to myself, and if I talk I will limit it severly.

Well thought the movie I only said 25 things I kept track so that I would know if I were being to annoying.  I was very proud of myself.  There must have been 225 times when I could have said something and I only said 25 things.  That dosen't mean that I didn't sit in my chair and laugh at inopportune times, and point at the screen and hold my hand over my mouth.

Oh I was a gentlemen one other time also, I had to fart real bad, and I asked if anyone wanted something to eat as I was going up to get something.  I stopped in the restroom and there was a girl there, the first thing that went though my mind was "Oh no not again" but she was just a cleaning woman and left.  I farted and left too so she could come back and finish her job.

On my was back into the theater I thought I had best stop and get something to eat as actual proof of my "lie".  I went up and bartered at the counter after finding out that I was the last peoson of the night to be served.  I got two pretzels for the price of one.  I went back in and offed the other pretzel for the other four to share, no one wanted any so Patrick took it and ate it.

So when I am halfway done with my pretzel I offer "b" some she says no, I counter with "But I asked them to take out all the carbs, fat, and calories are you shure", she again states that she dosn't want any.  When I am down to a quarter I offer again, she agian says no, then I am down to the last bite, you know me by now always a gentleman, I offer her the last bite and reinforce that I asks for all the bad stuff to be removed, she again says no.  So I take the last bite and offer her one more time that if she would like to lick out the bag I wouldn't tell anyone, she again says "no thanks".

So the movie is over and we are all leaving, we split up for bathrooms and the guys(obviously) were finished first so standing in the lobby the girls come out.  Mike makes a comment about not being able to see me cause of the camos I am waring, I told hold on and ran over in front of a tree, they couldn't see me at all.

I only had one more opportunity to be a gentleman for the rest of the night, in search of a coffee shop, we stop at a closed village inn, standing there in the rain, Mike looks at the russians and says, "well we had better find somewhere the girls are cold"  I being the guy who never gets cold offer Mikes girl("a") my coat.  Later on in the night we (me and patrick) told Mike that he should have been the one to do this, not me.  We stand and talk and then take off to find somewhere else.  We didn't so we split and headed home.

That was my experience being a spare tire, and "b" assured me that I wasn't annoying at all.  Wasn't that nice of her?  Maybe she likes me?  What about Patrick?  I being  a gentleman don't want to hurt anyones feelings.  Hummm, maybe I will let that girl go, for the sake of freindship . . .maybe.

BlackWolf